the cardigan life

wish list for july!!

2010-07-09T16:34:00.000-07:00

BDG Pure Blue High Rise Cigarette Jean $58.00
UO

Sparkle & Fade Lace Back Sweeheart Bodysuit $34.00
UO

Sparkle & Fade Belted High-Waisted Shorts $48.00
UO

Pins and Needles Floral Bustier Bodysuit $38.00
UO

BDG Varsity Cardigan $48.00
UO

Character Hero Prep School Crest Shirt $48.00
UO

Lucca Couture Sailor Short $48.00
UO

total eclipse of the heart

2010-05-05T11:09:00.001-07:00

beginning of the end

2010-04-13T17:05:00.000-07:00

just wrapped up Guys & Dolls. On to the next show. It's bittersweet to be done with it. I will enjoy having more time...for what? Working, I guess. I need need need money.

I just now realized that this really is the beginning of then end of my high school chapter. I graduate in less than two months. Prom is in a month. The senior show is also in a month. I need to make lots of money, even though I just quit my job. However, I have an interview at the Country Club next to my house tomorrow.

Sigh. I'm ready for this summer.

2010-04-02T15:49:00.000-07:00

outfit 3/30

outfit 4/1

outfit 4/2

all looks on my LOOKBOOK

Today I went to the park with Dimitri. We had a picnic. We kissed. We watched little boys play in the creek naked.

stolen from Lil

Never in my life have I been: overseas. I'd do anything in the world to go to Paris.

The one person who can drive me nuts is: my mother. she's lovely, but she really pushes my buttons.

High school: is hell.

When I'm nervous: my stomach churns and I sweat a lot. I also get really tongue tied.

The last song I listened to was: Lucille by Little Richard. It was the perfect day to blast that loudly in my car

If I were to get married right now my maid of honour would be: My best friend in the entire world, Caroline.

My hair is: red and sultry. I just got it done yesterday. It also is naturally wavy and luscious. I love my hair.

When I was 5: everything was simple and amazing. I miss that so much.

Last Christmas: I was happy as a clam in a perfect relationship.

I should be: happy.

The happiest recent event was: when my lovely friend Francois was in town two saturdays ago. We drank, we smoked, we listened to Grizzly Bear, we were merry as fuck.

By this time next year: I'll be living in Philly pursuing my dreams.

There's this girl I know that: that acts like a whore and is a complete bitch. Oh wait, that's 95% of the girls I know. I fucking hate girls.

I like you when: you kiss me.

The world could do without: Justin Bieber. or Vampires.

Most recent thing I've bought myself: was the beautiful floral bustier I'm wearing right now. (as seen above)

Most recent thing someone else bought me: my mama bought me the loveliest pair of shoes from AA.com (as seen above)

My middle name is: Ellen

The animals I would like to see flying besides birds are: pigs

Once, at a bar: I've never been to a bar!! I think I'll live too. It's just girls in short skirts and heels they can't walk in being stalked by guys who haven't gotten laid in a few weeks.

Last night I was: fucked up watching Discovery Channel.

There's this guy I know who: is perfect in every way.

Tomorrow I am: going to clean, and try not to be too lonely.

Tonight I am: going to look hot, and going to get messy with my best friends.

My birthday is: July 12.

hot new piece

2010-03-29T18:56:00.000-07:00

Free People Once of a Kind Verona Necklace - $628

I need this necklace more than anything in the world.

mental health day #2

2010-03-23T16:25:00.000-07:00

today is the second day i've stayed home ill. my mind is racing, my head hurts, and i'm tremendously sad right now. My situation with Dimitri is making me very sad and confused. I've learned that staying in bed all day doesn't really help me feel better. On the contrary, it actually makes me feel slightly worse.

What I dreamt last night:

Strangle
To dream that you or someone else is being strangled, denotes that you are repressing or denying a vital aspect of your expression.

i'm fixing a hole

2010-03-22T17:22:00.000-07:00

what i've been wearing lately

3/3/10

3/4/10

3/10/10

My life has been so crazy lately. I have found songs I'm in love with, and I've experienced some beautiful moments this past weekend. I've had delightful conversations, eaten good food, and got so pleasantly drunk on Saturday night that I said, "I'm so happy right now I could die."

I'm looking terribly forward to the future. I will be attending an all arts university in Philadelphia, surrounded by enthralling people who aren't afraid to dress strangely.

Things that are currently bothering me:

my "relationship"
my inability to find my nude bra
my weight

my april wishlist

2010-03-18T16:10:00.000-07:00

bow necklace - UO $18

Kimichi Blue eyelet dress - UO $58

canvas caryall satchel - UO $48

Dolce Vita Audrina dress - UO $198

Pins & Needles pleat sleeve knit dress - UO $48

Lucca Couture cropped jacket - UO $58

red espidrille wedges - UO $88

Dina & Ozzy spectator oxford - UO $48

Amanda shoe - AA $80

Riding Pant - AA $72

navy pin-up girl shorts - MC $89.99

i can breathe again

2010-02-28T13:18:00.000-08:00

what i wore last thursday

So far in my life...

my college auditions are done. yes!
i want to go to the University of the Arts so badly, but i think i fucked up my audition
last night was State Patty's day, and it was epic.
i've gained two pounds, and they won't go away
i conquered the King of Prussia mall, and got tons of new clothes
the waiting period begins for college letters. ughh.

valetine's

2010-02-14T15:59:00.000-08:00

What I bought over the weekend:

I had my Rutgers audition on Saturday, and now I'm over analyzing the shit out of it. Christ, I just want to go there so badly.

I became very ill on the way home, and I'm still feeling a bit under the weather.

I saw Casablanca for the first time today on the big screen. It was mesmerizing.

february mixes

2010-02-11T13:40:00.000-08:00

currently listening to: Cousins - Vampire Weekend

My February Playlist -- février - songs for the road to the future, and kissing boys in stairwells along the way
Notable tracks:
- on to the next one by jay-z
- dance, dance, dance by lykke li
- horchata by vampire weekend
- foreground by grizzly bear
- babys by bon iver
- thinking of you by pete yorn
- the funeral by band of horses

I made a mix for my dear, dear friend Tommy, who lives in Manhattan. And I'm particularly proud of this mix, because the transitions are beautiful between tracks.

"New York, I Love You" songs for frolicking around a snow covered city
tracklisting:
1. a dustland fairytale by the killers (for your arrival into the city)
2. taking control by alberta cross (for looking up at tall buildings)
3. time to pretend by mgmt (for leaving your apartment for a party, looking like a celebrity)
4. ragoo by kings of leon (for all the cute faces that greet you on the street)
5. sweet disposition by the temper trap (for looking out the window, and being overtaken by the city's beauty at night)
6. after hours by we are scientists (for running down the crowded street, laughing, the lights a-twinkling, and feeling extremely alive)
7. the great procrastinator by ivan campo (for 3 am meals, your shoes off your feet because they hurt from walking so much)
8. anthems for a seventeen year-old girl by broken social scene (for holding a new love's hand while walking them to the subway platform because they don't live in midtown)
9. foreground by grizzly bear (for the subway ride back to your bed)
10. dance, dance, dance by lykke li (for a city morning. grey and sunny)
11. single ladies (put a ring on it) by matt smith (for people-watching in washington square park)
12. horchata by vampire weekend (for deciding to go to brooklyn on a whim)
13. moi je joue by brigitte bardot (the vintage clothing shopping montage)
14. relator by pete yorn & scarlett johansson (for catching eyes with a gorgeous guy in a coffee shop in the lower east side)
15. embers by just jack (for realizing that you feel more alive in this city than anywhere else)
16. dirt off your bittersweet shoulders by jay-z vs. the verve (for lying in bed with your best friends, snacking on magnolia bakery confectioneries, saturday night live playing the background, and the window-open, with the sounds of the city playing a gorgeous tune)
17. on to the next one by jay-z (for exiting, and counting down until the next adventure)
download

new york, new york

2010-02-11T13:36:00.000-08:00

i went to new york last weekend. here's what it looked like.

Lo. Lee. Ta.

2010-02-10T14:02:00.001-08:00

I love few things in this world more than Vladimir Nabokov's Lolita. A story that is so controversial and almost disturbing, is beautiful and captivating due to its stunningly exquisite. I re-read this story at any chance I can get, and it still continues to leave me breathless.

shakespeare

2010-02-06T12:29:00.000-08:00

i met a boy. well, it was a boy i already knew from my acting conservatory over the summer, but i felt as if we had meet for the first time. a little piece of me fell completely in love with him. it's strange, because i've been studying shakespeare for years now, but he made realize how beautiful it truly can be. i've always thought shakespeare was beautiful, mainly just because romeo & juliet is, to me, the most beautiful story ever written. but he made me realize that even simple things, things we take for granted in modern english, once had a divine poignancy that we'll never be able to retrieve.

some of my favorite lines include:

ROMEO: I dream'd a dream to-night.
MERCUTIO: And so did I.
ROMEO: Well, what was yours?
MERCUTIO: That dreamers often lie. (- R&J)

HELENA: And though she be but little, she is fierce. (- A Midsummer Night's Dream)

ROMEO: Did my heart love till now? forswear it, sight!
For I ne'er saw true beauty till this night. (- R&J)

BOTTOM: I see their knavery: this is to make an ass of me. (- A Midsummer Night's Dream)

TYBALT: What, drawn, and talk of peace! I hate the word,
As I hate hell, all Montagues, and thee. (- R&J)

JULIET: Give me my Romeo; and, when he shall die,
Take him and cut him out in little stars,
And he will make the face of heaven so fine
That all the world will be in love with night
And pay no worship to the garish sun. (- R&J)

what I like about myself

2010-02-05T14:49:00.000-08:00

my blue eyes, and how well I am at playing them up
my shape. I have an hour glass figure, and though I do wish I was smaller, I have learned embrace my curves.
my natural ability to make new friends
the shape of my lips
my sense of humor
my determination to get whatever I want
my mind
my creativity
my ability to see beauty in everything
my sense of style
the luck i have to stumble across lovely films and music
my ballsy attitude
the way i can laugh at myself
my sensitivity (although this is something i also don't like about myself)

academy awards

2010-02-02T12:10:00.000-08:00

Movies I have to see before making Oscar predictions:

Avatar
The Blind Side
The Hurt Locker
Precious
A Serious Man (which I'm dyingggg to see)
Up In the Air
Up

tomorrow is thursday

2010-01-27T18:18:00.000-08:00

To Do:

get travel form signed
ace my calculus test
hit the gym, and don't leave until 500 or more calories are burned
clean out car, school bag and room
practice monologues for college auditions
pack for this weekend
DQ with my girls
DOWNLOAD NEW EPISODE OF SKINS

a year in mixes

2010-01-26T16:09:00.000-08:00

Every month I make a playlist of the songs that inspire me.

March - songs for feeling alive, and feeling alone.
Notable tracks:
Clair De Lune - Debussy
Break - Son Lux
Lucille - Little Richard
I Am a Full Grown Man (And I Will Lay Down in the Grass) - Phosphorescent
Halfway Home - TV on the Radio

None for April...

May - YOU GOT IT. songs for living in the 1940's on a lake
Notable tracks:
Black or White - Michael Jackson
Embraceable Y0u - Judy Garland
The Fear - Lily Allen
Take A Bow - Muse
Analyse - Thom Yorke

June - Just because it's JUNE. songs for hot classrooms and remaining young.
Notable tracks:
Cool - West Side Story
Oh Sherrie - Rock of Ages OBCR
Poker Face (Acoustic/Live on AOL) - Lady Gaga
Tore My Heart - David Tweetie & Oona
Poker Face (Cover) - David Choi

July - songs from the summer of love
Notable tracks:
Young Pilgrims - The Shins
Creator - Santigold
Florescent Adolescent - Arctic Monkeys
Woods - Bon Iver
Here Come The Bastards - Primus

August - songs for when you're missing everyone, including yourself.
Notable tracks:
Skinny Love - Bon Iver
Accidental Babies - Damien Rice
Colorblind - Counting Crows
Wait (The Whisper Song) - The Ying Yang Twins
Freedom Hangs like Heaven - Iron & Wine

September - songs for new beginnings (my favorite month playlist)
Notable tracks:
Anonanimal - Andrew Bird
Relator - Scarlett Johansson & Pete Yorn
Embers - Just Jack
Sweet Disposition - The Temper Trap
Paparazzi (Live at the VMAs) - Lady Gaga

October - songs for when "We're caught in a bad romance" and then leaving that romance for something sweeter
Notable tracks:
Bad Romance/New York (Live on SNL) - Lady Gaga
Love of an Orchestra - Noah and the Whale
re: Stacks - Bon Iver
Diamonds are Forever - Shirley Bassey
Made Up Love Song #43 - Guillemots

November - songs for moving on (finally)
Notable tracks:
Taking Control - Alberta Cross
Tears of a Clown - Smokey Robinson & The Miracles
My Heart Stood Still - The Mamas & The Papas
Whatever You Like - Anya Marina
God Only Knows - The Beach Boys

December - Songs for epiphanies, cold cars, and time travel
Notable tracks:
Dancing with Myself - Billy Idol
Redford (For Yia-Yia & Pappou) - Sufjan Stevens
The Heretic - The Sound of Animals Fighting
Swans - Unkle Bob
Murry - Pete Yorn

Janvier - songs for a new year, and the same mistakes. for cold hearts, cold cars, and kissing french boys in them
Notable tracks:
Moi je joue - Brigitte Bardot
Tonight - Lykke Li
Anthems for a Seventeen-year-old Girl - Broken Social Scene
When U Love Somebody - Fruit Bats
Relator (Live at Interface) - Scarlett Johansson & Pete Yorn

january blues

2010-01-14T18:18:00.001-08:00

things have been terribly difficult for me lately. I'm having to deal with social issues with a girl at school, and with the boy whom I am love(d). I know that I'm supposed to keep my eye on my future with my college auditions coming up, but all the shit I've had to face lately has made it extremely hard to focus on my art. I hate crying, and I hate dreading to face a new day, but lately it's been like that. It's hard because every time I finally regain my composure in life, something always knocks me off my feet. Most of it is due to this boy. Sometimes I wonder whether its worth the hurt to be with him, rather than being without him and putting my life back together.

5 things that always put me in a good mood.

Lady Gaga
she's brilliant. she's incredibly talented. she's incredibly witty. she's incredibly well-spoken and intelligent. she's ballsy. she doesn't give a fuck about what anyone thinks of her. The only CD's in my car are The Fame and The Fame Monster. I listen to The Fame in the morning until the sun begins to go down, then I put in The Fame Monster.

Online Shopping
retail therapy works wonders on me.

Cute and Comfy Outfits

they make me feel confident. and when I'm confident, there is no stopping me.

David
My favorite person in the world. I met him over the summer, and we fell completely head over heels for each other (in a completely platonic friendship way) I miss him every day, even though we talk on the phone most nights. He always knows the right thing to say to me, and has made my life so much more beautiful. i love him with all my heart.

My father
My other favorite person in the world. My dad is the sweetest, funniest, and coolest man. I'm so lucky to have him as my father. He does so much for me, and asks for nothing in return. I love him and will miss him terribly when I'm off at university.

current youtube loves

2010-01-08T17:29:00.000-08:00

- little french girl tells a whimsical story

- effy's interactive trailer for skins series 3

- sandra beijer in her black dress

fashion lust

2010-01-07T19:06:00.000-08:00

Zen Garden Two Piece Swimsuit
Modcloth - $89.99

Zeitgeist Booties in Grey
Modcloth - $49.99

Urban Renewal Patterned Short Shorts
Urban Outfitters - $48

Marysia Ruffled Bikini
Urban Outfitters - $196

Lucca Couture Open-Back Dress
Urban Outfitters - $58

Lucca Couture Cropped Jacket
Urban Outfitters - $58

Kimchi Blue Swiss Dot Oxford
Urban Outfitters - $38

Deena & Ozzy Spectator Oxford
Urban Outfitters - $48

je veux ton amour, et je veux ta revenge

2010-01-06T11:54:00.000-08:00

Today, January the 6th, I...
- wore a kick-ass outfit. as seen above.
- got a lot of psychology work done.
- met a boy I think I like.

All in all, good day.

Also, I can't stop listening to Move (Metronomy Remix by CSS.

pola-what?

2010-01-05T14:34:00.001-08:00

I've been an avid polaroid taker since November of last year. To say that I'm obsessed would be an understatement. I love everything about them. They capture moments so beautifully. I love how nostalgic they make me when I look at them. They remind me of precious moments that I can re-live again and again through a colored film picture.

Unfortunately I've been slacking on my picture taking lately. I'm trying to conserve my film until they restart making it in mid 2010. I've been rationing my film for so long. I can't wait until they release black and white!

drunken times in 2009

2010-01-03T10:31:00.000-08:00

2009 was the year I began going slightly wild. I drank some, and I smoked more. From Summer to now, I've been living for the weekends with my favorite people so we can get completely fucked up. There's something so glorious about the feeling you get when you're high as a kite.

Also, for some reason I'm much more attractive when I'm in that state. I know this because I hook up with really gorgeous people when I'm partying. Maybe that's because they're drunk too. I don't know, but it makes me feel like a femme fatale.

Awkwardly enough though, I'm usually the one who has the carry around the drunk people and take care of them when they're throwing up all over the carpet. Not my favorite job, but I like to make sure at least one person is in control.

Hopefully 2010 will bring more lovely times like the ones i've had.

2010-01-02T19:36:00.000-08:00

Hi there. I'm Bebe, even though my birth name is Rebekah. Sometimes I can't decide which name I like better. I've been wanting to start a blog for sometime. This little space will consist of my life rants, things that inspire me, and little poems that my red head thinks of.

Here are a few of my favorite things.

Bernardo Bertolucci's "The Dreamers"

I watch this movie more than any other film. It leaves me completely stunned after every viewing. The dialogue is gorgeous, and the acting is superb. I love every second of it.

Sandra Beijer and her blog.

Niotillfem is one of my biggest style inspirations. Sandra has a terribly beautiful life, and I'm extremely envious of her travels, style, and gorgeous boyfriend.

Skins

I've been watching this show since the lovely Lil (http://lil-astorminateacup.blogspot.com/) suggested I watch it. I fell head over heels in love with it. I love that it's funny and dramatic, but not contrived like a lot of teen shows. The dialogue is witty, and the cinematography is astounding. Plus, the music is kick-ass.

Lady Gaga

She's a star. I love her catchy songs, I love her outlandish style, I love that she doesn't give a damn about what people think of her, I love her passion, I love that her songs (no matter how strange they can be) actually mean something real.

Oxfords

I love a good pair of wing tips paired with a dress and socks or silk tap shorts.